The end of April marks a year working full time in my business, The Maker’s Stash. At times, working full time in my own business felt like a far-off dream. There was a lot of fear surrounding my desire of working solely for myself. Would I be successful? Would I be able to earn a wage? Would I sink us further in debt? Would I be wasting my time. Would it make life stressful? Would I have the motivation and discipline to work on the hard stuff and the boring stuff as well as the fun stuff? Do I even know how to run a business?
So much doubt.
So, what has been the answer to all those doubts?
Is my business successful? Well, that depends on your definition of success, but for me it’s probably to early to tell.
Would I be able to earn a wage? In truth, no, I have not yet been able to earn a proper wage.
Would I sink us further in debt? No, while I used personal savings at the start I have largely been able to pay for all my business expenses from the business itself.
Would I be wasting my time? I will admit that I have had thoughts of ‘why am I doing this, I’m wasting my time’ and ‘it would be easier to just get a job working for someone else’. So, what stops me from quitting, my eternal optimism!
Would it make life stressful? Well, a little bit, but only from a financial point of view.
Would I have the motivation and discipline? As a serial procrastinator I do often struggle with discipline, certainly when it comes to prioritising tasks. I often work on the fun thing rather than the boring or tedious thing. Am I motivated? Absolutely! This business is an extension of me, of my soul and I am most definitely motivated to nurture it, grow it and look after it.
Do I know how to run a business? Yes, I learnt so much about business when I worked as an interior designer and when I had the BMM shop. Have I figured it all out, no, but I’m constantly learning.
After a year working full time in my business, I find myself contemplating Success versus Fulfilment.
Webster dictionary defines success as:
“a favorable or desired outcome”
“the attainment of wealth, favor, or eminence”
Cambridge dictionary defines it as:
“the achieving of the results wanted or hoped for”
“something that achieves positive results”
Fulfilment can have an objective meaning referring to the act or process of completing something, such as fulfilling a promise, requirement, or order. It can also have a subjective meaning such as the feeling of pleasure and satisfaction that arises when one’s desires or needs are met, or when one achieves personal goals.
Looking beyond formal definitions, success is deeply personal and subjective. We all define it differently and I think it’s an important thing to think about, whether you run your own business, work for someone else, or don’t work at all.
Success to me looks different to how I perceived it when I was younger. When I was studying Interior Design, I had the view that I wanted to be a successful designer, living and working abroad in England and Europe, and working on a design magazine. I wanted to own my home and be able to travel oversees frequently. I wanted to have money, to be able to pay for anything I wanted, to not struggle to pay bills and make ends meet.
Today though, my idea of success looks a little different and rather than thinking so much about being successful, I think about being fulfilled in my success. I desire to cultivate a life and business where I can be creative, where I can teach and share, and where I can spread joy and beauty.
I want to create a space of nurture both in our home and in my business, where dreams can be granted instead of being dismissed. Where little whims can be followed and curiosity awakened. Where kindness lives large and everyone is supported.
I feel like right now I am doing what I’m supposed to be doing. When I decided to go full time in the business, I thought it’s now or never. At 40 years old it felt like the time had come to do something for me, to follow the dream and give it a go. I feel grateful that I have been able to do it, to pursue going full time. It has been hard work, but it’s been fulfilling.
I have been able to inspire and pass on my joy to so many customers and followers. I have had people see me at a show who swore they would never enjoy English Paper Piecing, come back a year later and tell me how much they now love it. For me, that is success right there! If I can encourage anyone to try EPP and slow stitching and have them reap the benefits and get joy from it that is what makes it worthwhile for me and gives me a sense of pride and fulfillment.
I think there will always be a monetary element to success in my business. No one likes to talk about money, me included, but it’s not really something that should be shied away from. I want my business to be successful financially. Now I don’t want to become some massive multinational or multimillion-dollar business, far, far from it! But I would like to see my business grow out of my home studio and into a shop space with room for stitch meet ups and classes. I would like to be able to pay myself a decent wage on a regular monthly basis. I would like to be able to employ people to work with me. I would like to be able to give back to the community.
While there are aspects of success I’m still working on, I feel that in terms of personal fulfillment I am well on my way. I have found my sense of purpose and can see my personal and business potential. Through my stitching, designing, creating, homemaking and growing I am creating the meaningful and satisfying life I want to lead.
Happy Stitching & Living Friends,
Miss Leela x
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